Coffee Stains
by shikatemajerica
Summary: When Shikamaru decides to stay over. Who knew completing an English assignment was such a pain? OneShot


Shikamaru rolled over to lie down sideways, into a more comfortable position.

"So what does this mean Temari?" he croaked out, while pointing towards the piece of paper lying on the somewhat smallish table.

"I've already told you not to ask me" she sighed while shaking her head, "also stop moving around too much, this carpet is new". Placing down some coffee she turned to him and settled a tired chin down into a palm.

It was the usual. It was a Monday afternoon, cosy and warm inside Temari's apartment, away from the icy cold winds. It's quite natural for Shikamaru to be able to enter the over bearing woman's premises, while having some coffee. Well, this is regularly the case. It's not really an excuse for him to stay over.

"No really I need your help; this English assignment is a pain" he insisted.

"And what made you think I am good at English!"

"Oh come on woman" Shikamaru responded while closing his eyes . He moved an arm to secure his head from the ground and act as an attempt for a pillow "you study... urmm Government and Politics was it?"

Quickly Temari stopped the urge for the immediate contact from palm to face. "How long have I known you?" she demanded. She cursed before stating "Not English."

The female downed a large amount of her coffee while sighing. "Besides I thought you wanted to study Mathematics at university, what's with the English?" Temari questioned.

Shikamaru in return becomes the one that begins to sigh. "As I've told you countless of times Temari, I want to become an actuary and in order for this to become achievable, I need study English AS".

Temari raised an eyebrow, "Hmm I'll consider" she exclaimed. "Persuade me. You know use your usual tactics and I'll give you a hand" she smiled "You better get up you lazy old man and actually use your talents".

"Oh, Temari" he complained opening an eye to look at her. He turned away from her in grimace as he sighted her foul expression obviously wanting to play with him. "I have English first thing tomorrow" he added. Silence. Judging from her no response he decided to try something else, "Temari it's troublesome asking you... and even more troublesome completing this paper; I really need your help"

Temari smiled her usual devilish grin. "Say that again, will you?"

A frown appeared on the lazy Shinobi's face. Shikamaru's eyes narrowed as his face tilted her direction. "Come on Temari. I'm not playing games"

"Neither am I", she explained. Face turning away with that little gracefulness she always had. Why was Shikamaru attracted to her again? "I just didn't hear that last bit properly" an obvious grin rising from her face.

Damn, the way she keeps procrastinating.

A growl escaped from Shikamaru's side why is she so troublesome? Shikamaru rose up as he used his own thigh as a support and turned to assume a new position, a sort of bowing position? He kept his face down, lowering his profile.

After a second of the confusion from Temari he lifted his head to look at her in the eyes. "I.. need.. your...-cough- help Temari your highness, oh I mean, indeed your excellency, is there any way of helping a poor soul like me with this nasty and unachievable curse?" bowed Shikamaru in a very exaggerated tone.

Holding back some giggles Temari turned to face the poor soul and patted him on the head, "you didn't need to go that far but I guess I'll help you".

His passive face immediately exchanged itself with a smile. "Real-"

"On one condition" she interrupted as she held one finger up towards him.

Shikamaru sprawled himself freely across the floor while reaching for his drink.

"And that would be?" he questioned while sipping his coffee.

"Stay over for the night" she said proudly, almost automatically. She stood up while grinning in the most widely and troublesome way.

The flawless brand new carpet was then stained brown by Shikamaru.

It's obvious she's got plans for tonight.

* * *

><p>Temari rolled a heavy deep sleeping deer off of her while stretching. "Oh my goodness! Shikamaru wake up!" she slapped him continuously until he began to stir.<p>

"Uhhh what is it Temari?" groaned Shikamaru, slowly rubbing his eyes. "And can you stop hitting me around my buttocks area, please consider my feelings".

"Look at the time!" she pointed towards the digital clock indicating 5.30 am.

Shikamaru shot up in the air faster than what is physically possible. "What!.. I don't understand" he looked around the room readjusting his memory. "Where are my pants?" he questioned, confused while looking down. He started rummaging around Temari's things looking for the disappearance of his pants.

"You honestly don't remember?" replied Temari is a dangerously husky tone. Did Shikamaru hear that correctly?

He turned to look at her as she slowly stood up from the floor moving in what you would call a very flirtatious way. Face flushed, while pulling down her shirt that is way too tight for her, just barely covering her stomach "Hmm?" she breathed out.

Why is the room so hot?

He watched her as she re-tied her puffy dirty blond hair up into her usual four pony tails. Why was her hair down? Why is she so sexy with her hair down, even if her hair looks close the colour of the left over oil his mum makes in his chicken?

There definitely needs to be more windows opened. The temperature isn't normal. Shikamaru's mouth gaped open from the scene in front of him. He still needed to reassure himself of the situation.

After collecting his thoughts together he manages to accumulate together 3 facts: he does not remember what happened last night, they are both half naked and he finds this situation very amusing.

Temari closed her palm together making a fist shape and then re opening it. "My hands are still sticky from last night" she grinned. Temari turned to look at Shikamaru and smelt her own palm "It reeks too, I thoroughly enjoyed last night" she giggled as she swept back some loose strands of hair that was previously covering her face.

Shikamaru just stopped. He literally stopped.

He could have died happy that very moment. He didn't care about anything else. He didn't care about his English assignment. He didn't care he was a virgin, _well not anymore at the very least_. All he cared about was remembering what _happened_ last night! Who knows, he could've lost the bet memories of his lifetime.

She turned her head in a concerned fashion. "Shikamaru.. you do remember what happened last night... don't you?". After no response her smile turned the antithesis. Large amount of anger seemed to magnify out into the atmosphere.

Shikamaru, being Shikamaru just turned away and murmured "troublesome". Maybe a blush appeared from his cheeks.

Temari turned crimson of the sudden realisation. She quickly grabbed her fan no time to waste and sprinted towards Shikamaru's direction. "IT'S NOT WHAT YOU THINK IT IS!" she screamed a little too loudly blushing enormously while Shikamaru dodged a fatal blow.

"WOMAN calm down! I wasn't ... thinking that way.." he complained half heartedly as he dodged another yet fatal blow.

Twenty minutes later. They both seem to have come to have collected their emotions together as they are both communicating to each other by phone. Shikamaru was on his way to college and Temari was still sitting on her carpet drinking some of yesterday's coffee.

"Temari now that you've calmed down will you kindly explain?" he said breathing heavily from the continuous exercise. The iPhone he was holding began clouding from his constant breaths. He decided staying over at Temari's place is not such a good idea anymore.

"Fine" was all Temari said in an exhale, her face still obviously flushed on the camera in his phone.

"After you spilled your stupid coffee I gave you sake, this is because you claimed to have said that the assignment is stressing you out" she snorted. Shikamaru rolled his eyes but still watched and listened. "Anyway after that, you needed to still clean the coffee spill on the floor, so we basically got my stain remover and scrubbed" she sighed "the scrubbing was a lot harder than I thought, but when we finished you collapsed right on top of me!". She seemed to have risen her voice gradually as Shikamaru moved his phone away from his ear

A guilty looking Shikamaru whistled while diverting his attention to another part of the city. My was winter in Konoha ever this cold? Temari's glare bore holes within his body, while waiting for a response.

Time was ticking by and he really needed to get out of this troublesome situation. I mean, class is starting in 30 minutes. Not to mention he still has his English assignment. 'When did Temari ever wore those pinks shorts she had on today?' thought Shikamaru.

"Shikamaru!" she wailed on the other side of the line.

"That doesn't explain why we're half naked" was the only thing he managed to say in a monotone voice. A waver could be heard in his voice as he said the word 'naked'.

"You spilled coffee on both of us" she exclaimed.

"Ah"

So much for such genius.

* * *

><p><strong>This is something I made for fun as my friends are too going to be uploading fics too! It's so embarrassing for me to upload this<strong>

**I know my grammar and spelling are off, but please enjoy this if you can.**

**If you found this even a little bit funny please review, it will make me happy as I never wrote much in my life anyway**


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